Fawcett Avenue Conscripts: WHFB Final: Hobgoblins 2, Rest of Warhammer World 0

Lieutenant Gnashrak lead his Hobgoblin Wolfriders to a stunning victory last night over a Chaos Warrior army, and the result wasn't even close.

"Once again, we wrecked they shit," Gnashrak said. "Represent for the Dark Lands!!" he added, throwing a greenskin gang sign.

Gnashrak's hobgoblins were part of an allied Chaos Dwarf force that joined the Orcs and Goblins of Ulkurz Teetheater, Black Orc general. Teetheater's army faced off against Chaos Captain Axmonides and his combined Warrrior and Daemon force.

"We really didn't bring the intensity tonight that we needed," a clearly disappointed Axmonides said. "I include myself in that, too. I had two chances to finish off Teetheater in a challenge situation and I really didn't step up. I just feel bad for the guys, and our fans."

Teetheater eliminated Axmonides from the battle after just two rounds of fighting. That wasn't nearly the worst result for the Chaos squad though. On the other flank, Chaos Lieutenant Skully was leading a squad of ten Chaos Knights, a combined unit representing an investment by the team owners of nearly 525 points. In the initial deployment the squad lined up across from a unit of eight Chaos Dwarf Bull Centaurs, a matchup that was welcomed by Skully.

"That was really an optimal matchup for us. We had a prime opportunity there. I think the guys were trying hard but things just didn't break our way," Skully said. "However, we had zero support on the magic front and our shooting phase was literally non-existent. These are things that we've been struggling with all year."

The eight Bull Centaurs under Captain Bashnak did yeoman's work in routing the superior Knights and massacring them to a man. "I gotta hand it to my guys, they really brought their 'A' game out tonight," Bashnak said. "<Snort>" he added.

Axmonides' other flank fared little better. "We had brought Larry [Johnson] and Kyle [Deemer] up from the Chaos Spawn farm system and we really had some high hopes for them," Axmonides said. "However they really seemed pretty directionless out there."

"Jljfdle ljkjhfle mnbecjh," added Johnson, as he pulled a four-foot long bolt thrower missile from his tentacle.

Teetheater summed up the match succinctly. "We knowed dat we 'ad to come out swingin', an' we did just dat fing," he said. "Da boyz did some reel good smashin', even da stunties wit' da big 'ats, dem did reel good. Da gobbos runned away, but dat's no big fing, gobbos always run. Da main fing is we put anuvver tick in da win collum."

It was Teetheater's first appearance at Fawcett and his record improves to 1:0. The Chaos Dwarfs redeemed an earlier massacre by the Empire and sit at 1:1. Axmonides' Chaos squad remains winless.

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Last night Perry brought out his Orcs and Goblins for some Warhammer Fantasy Battle. He had 1,000 points done so I drew up a Chaos Dwarf allied list of 1,000 points or so, and a Chaos Warrior list of 2,000 points to face them.

Perry and Mike ran the greenskin/stunty combo and Cam and I ran the Chaos crew. Deployment went well for us with the centre stacked with Chaos Warriors and Marauders against Orcs, Black Orcs and a large Goblin unit. A large unit of Knights with a tooled-up exalted champion anchored the Chaos right, facing a unit of Bull Centaurs.

Well, to put things mildly, it was a disaster. The Knight ended up beaten and run down by the Centaurs. While the Marauders routed and destroyed the large Goblin unit, they were in turn charged in the flank and destroyed. Our large Warrior unit (with General) was charged (twice!!) by Perry's large Black Orc unit (with General) and chariot. The Warriors held up OK but our General was killed. The Spawn wandered aimlessly, our Furies drove off the Doomdiver crew but were killed by Orc Arrer Boyz (!), our Chariot died, the Horrors died from instability... it was just a brutal game... mainly due to our appalling (and Mike's amazing) die rolling. The only time we saw any "6"s was when taking Leadership checks (and that's the only time Mike rolled any "1"s). Fun game though!